In Sudan he can even marry a goat, but I doubt he's going to find one that's 4 years older than him. she also luvs me. If he's a good guy and you both click, I'll say go for it. As we would be at completely different points in our life which would likely put a strain on any possible relationship. And I do agree, looks play a big role in relationships. Although more older men marry younger women, ... My grandmother was 10 years older than my grandfather, and my mother was two years older than my father. I would have to work extra hard to maintain my looks n you know what the guy isn't really attractive but nobody cares if a guy is ugly. Happy is the wife who sees her husband’s firmness in religion and becomes pious so as not to lose her eternal friend."(7). At your age now, you may see the two-year difference as big but as you get older, you will see that there is not much of a difference. I am very mature for my age, I have been through alot and because of that I had to grow up pretty quick. He started collecting Social Security Disability when he was 40. What should be the criterion for eating. The problem is not with the two years age difference, it's just that he's too young for marriage. Can anyone tell me that marrying an elder women is permitted in Islam. There's nothing wrong with either way. The problem is not with the two years age difference, it's just that he's too young for marriage. a 15 year old girl+a 21 year old guy in love?? That would be a guideline of the oldest you should date. Probably marrying a girl two years older because a younger girl would never marry him. I’m a 37 year old male and have been dating women 10 years + younger than me throughout my thirties. 2. If you truly love someone, then you shouldn't plan your life and marriage around looks, but other important things that make up a happy home and marriage. New details released on Nashville person of interest, Hilaria Baldwin shares video addressing ethnicity flap, Wrestling star Jon Huber, aka Brodie Lee, dies at 41, N.Y. health network faces criminal probe over vaccine, Utah freshman running back Ty Jordan dies. That is, they should be suitable to one another. I never get why people push for a younger woman when we have an example in our Prophet of the opposite. In addition, if the religiousness and ethics of a woman has the desired quality, the fact that she is from a rich family and that she has her own property can be an additional reason for preference. (3) And girls would you constantly obsess over your looks if you were married to a younger guy? If you marry a girl than is 2 years older than you, as time progresses it will appear as if she is 10 years older than you! Badiuzzaman says; " According to the Shari’a, the husband should be a good match for the wife. Musnad, 2: 539. The Bible places no requirements for age in marriage. Happy is the husband who sees the wife’s firm religion and follows her, and himself becomes pious in order not to lose his companion of eternal life. Our Prophet (pbuh), who attracts attention to the issue, gives believers the following advice: "Women are preferred for four qualities in marriage: for her property, nobility, beauty and religion. Denise — Staten Island, N.Y.: I was married for 15 years to my ex-husband. Strong Christian. When Hazrat Umar asked the Prophet, "What kind of goods should we obtain to meet our needs? 7. I'm in the same dilemma, I prefer older men but it I guess it's about maturity which not many younger men have. But the seven years rule is this: double you age and subtract seven. So if I were 27 and he was 25 and we were in love, it wouldn't matter to me. It doesn't always mean that they'll be unfaithful or feel that you're no longer good for him. Another point to be taken into consideration is that the mahr of the woman should not be much. The parents who give importance only to beauty, wealth and social status but not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief. An individual can marry in the United States as of right, without parental consent or other authorization, on reaching 18 years of age (and used to be 21 years of age before 1971), as that is the age of majority, in all states except in Nebraska, where the general marriage age is 19 as that is the age of majority, and Mississippi where the general marriage age is 21 as that is the age of majority in these states. Muslims, can you check if this is complete audiobook of Sahih bukhari in Arabic? Ihya, 2: 38. It's the embarrassment factor which would affect me even though I know 27 and 25 are near enough but its the life experiences which make you more mature. 5. We are much in love, and celebrate each month together! There will even be a time when everyone will think she's your mother! Asalamu alaikum. Soooo guys would you want to marry a woman two years younger than you? As long as he's 18 he can do whatever he wants. The first guy I properly dated was exactly a year younger than me (we shared the same birthday, I thought it was meant to be) and the last guy I dated was four years younger than me. Choose (marry) the religious woman so that your home will be in abundance. Marry the religious one. If something looks pretty or nice, we all look at it... and it doesn't always have to mean we look at it in a bad or sexual way. After all, most of the women who are careful in their religious life will try to act in accordance with the Islamic ethics. Its totally not OK to marry a woman who is your mate or who is older unless you are ready to bear the consequences. Most guys want to get married with young girls who are less than 10, 15, 20 and maybe 30 years old. Since the Bible is silent on this concern, all believers have liberty in this area, meaning a man of any age may marry a woman of any age so long as both are old enough to enter into marriage by law and custom and both have consented to the marriage. Girls can you date a guy a year or two younger? Doubtlessly, a black female slave with a cut nose, and pierced ear is better that a woman who is not religious.". I met a Indonesian Muslim girl. What are the benefits of eating and drinking a little? Such a marriage will probably break down because it usually becomes impossible to live in harmony for spouses with different lifestyles. There are men who are 40 and act like they're 17, so you should put your focus on his mentality and maturity level. Will you give information about marrying a non-Muslim woman and being a witness of marriage? So, no I will not marry a younger man. Still have questions? The important thing is to know whether he's mature or not. "He looks old enough to be her Dad". There is no drawback to it. Ten to twenty years is an age gap, not two years. If some one is going to be so vain and will leave you because your not pretty any more. Ibn Majah, Nikah: 6. My husband is 15 years younger than me. 4. That quality is mentioned as a different reason in the hadith. Okay a few weeks ago if you remember I asked advice on marrying a guy two years younger than me but i've always liked older guys n younger guys remind me of my lil brother lol but the guy is okay with it n he has the nicest parents. Women tend to age faster than men...so yes...he might not be physically attracted to you later. I asked my friend how old he was, to which she replied, "He's in his early 30s." (Which meant, that I would no sooner marry a 50 year old than an 80 year old!) What to do w/ paranoid Shias who think all Jews have no choice but to convert or die? ", he answered: "The best goods are a tongue that mentions the names of Allah (dhikr), a heart that thanks Allah and a believing woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities regarding the hereafter."(5). 26 year old guy dating 19 year old girl I'm a 17 year old girl and dating a 27 year old guy. Otherwise I could have fallen for anyone who seemed like a great guy and told me that he loved me. I am not the type of girl he ever dated(yes I know dating is haram) or was ever interested in as far as my body image. Tarbiyatu'l-Awlad, 1: 38. Do not marry them only for their property because their property may deprave them. Similarly, the marriage of a religious man with a woman who does not act in accordance with the divine commands and who is not religious will cause a lot of problems and will be difficult to continue. I mean she brought it up once or twice that she wished she was younger because she felt like she wasn't able to live in the moment as much as she used to do but it didn't really cause any problems. Prefer the religious one, you will be happy."(4). My second — I was 28 and she was 41 — lasted three years and we lived together for one year. Once he got to know me and fell in love with me because of my personality and what he calls my big heart, he found me to be the most beautiful woman in the world. For me, he couldn’t be older than me by 10-12 years. (ie an 18 year old --> 18x2= 36. "(6) The most important aspect of this being suitable is from the point of view of religion. Would you really want to remain married to such a person any ways? But the fact is, men are by nature attracted to things that look appealing to the eye. If he loves your daughter, he will treat her well; if he hates your daughter, he will not oppress her. No one will know just by looking at you lol. He's a great guy, has no bad habits n I've known him since I was 2 years old which is when he was born lol i remember him as a baby but I'm just like what if I have 5 kids n I'm 40 n he's not attracted to me anymore? Another quality to be sought in the woman is being good-tempered and having high ethics. Then, if the spouses agree to marry, an inequality in terms of richness and poverty will not be a serious drawback to marriage. (2). In some countries he can even marry a 4 year older man. Being married to a younger guy doesn't mean that you won't be able to maintain your looks. jmonteros: 'My 61-year-old father doted on his 18-year-old bride' After my mother's death, my 61-year-old father married a young girl of 18. You can sign in to vote the answer. Our Prophet regards the woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities as one of the most important wealth. It is very important for the peace of the home to be established and the training and education of the children to be born that the man choose the girl to marry carefully and the parents of the girl choose the son-in-law carefully. Yes, it can work. I sure wouldn't. The answer depends on who you are – male or a female, and how you plan on getting married – marrying for love or arranged marriage. Why would 2 years make a difference if you love someone? Islamic scholars state that the poverty of a good and virtuous candidate will not be a barrier for equality between the husband and wife and for the marriage. Join Yahoo Answers and get 100 points today. These states were California, Idaho, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, … Today, in some regions, bride price, which is a custom of ignorance, still leads to the prevention of marriage. Our Prophet, who advised us to be careful in choosing the son-in-law and daughter-in-law, wanted us to be cautious by saying, "People are like mines in terms of good deeds and bad deeds. God knows that's what I felt, while dating the above-noted older dude — I felt like his desire for me marked me as more mature and interesting than my peers. "My first relationship with an older woman — I was 20 and she was 36 — lasted two and a half years. A child marriage, also referred to as an underage marriage in the United States, is a marriage in which at least one party is under 18 years of age. Probably marrying a girl two years older because a younger girl would never marry him. How do you think about the answers? In the end though, age is just a number so don't stress too much over it. Pls guide me how to get permission frm parents. Every year, there are thousands of Vietnamese American, Canadian, Australian men (Viet Kieu) come back to Vietnam to marry these girls. Lem'alar (Flashes), p. 186. He will never be able to handle a woman, specially an older woman who has higher expectation considering that she's more mature. (Bukhari) Could you please explain this hadith? My first husband was 15 years older than I, I remarried four years after he died, my husband now is 20 years older. Why can’t a Muslim woman marry a Christian man? So, it ensures the continuation of the system in the community on sound principles. He does have 2 girls. I dated a girl who was 2 years older than me and it wasn't really a problem. Each state, territory and federal district sets the marriage age in its jurisdiction. I’ve learnt a thing or two about the benefits of dating younger women, and how to make it happen. A similar or equal level between the couples is very important so that the marriage will not break in the future. I like a guy who is much older than me Girls would you ever marry someone the same height as you? A man should look for a religious woman to marry; similarly, it is the duty of the parents of the girl to give importance to the religiousness of the man to marry their daughter. Can having little income be regarded as a barrier to marriage? We get on so well, and just click, we have the same likes and dislikes and can relate to each other really well. 2 years is nothing really---I have never let a number define my relationship & I know that my man wouldn't either--I think that girls always think about our looks--no matter what our age but, I don't obsess over mine--your going to get older & he's going to get older & your looks are going to change...your not marrying him for his looks(and vice versa) I'm sure--or at least I hope not! she is 2 years elder than me. Hasan al-Basri says, "Give her to a man who fears Allah. The racism didn't come as a shock. For me personally, I would prefer an older man, when I say older I mean ten to twenty years. He spends alot of time with my son. 2) Women age faster than men. When I get older it wouldn't matter really if the guy was a year or two younger, however at this stage of my life no I wouldn't date someone younger than me. I know when we go out, people think I am his daughter and Alex is his grandson. Submitted by csd_20 on Wed, 29/07/2009 - 19:35, A woman can marry a man younger or older than her. 36-7=29. If you are going through an arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked for you! Tirmidhi, Tafsiru'l-Qur'an.- 48, Ibn Majah, Nikah: 5. i am in lu wid her. Hon age is just a number. Two years is basically no difference in my opinion. You should take care of your body no matter what. It is certain that a religious girl and a frivolous man will not make a good couple. He is now 67. 28 and 25. You're still in the same generation and whatnot. Why did Allah make me so handsome? Two years isn't much a difference. First of all, the main purpose of a marriage is to bring up good children; it is also important because marriage prevents the person to be married from committing some sins and ensures him/her to have a regular life. When both parties take the aspect of religiousness into consideration, they will naturally give importance to other aspects. Jibaro on April 12, 2018: Ladies any relation and for whatever reason is great as long both parties are clear of their reasons behind their actions. Well, I will date a guy who is not more than 2 years older than me (depends though, but as I grow older I might increase that number to 4). The aftermath did. Older guys.... Largest age gap in a relationship? There are days I feel beautiful and other days that I don't. Well at this age, I think there's a huge difference in maturity levels between a 17 year old boy and a 19 year old girl, but I think once you both hit 25 you level out. In this article, I’ll share the 10 key lessons I learned about life from dating younger women. Never divorced. by mamba ( m ): 8:57am On May 11 , 2005 I need some hidayat lol Thanks :-), Looks play a big role in relationships n that is the honest truth even if the guy is accepting of your physical image the girl might not have that confidence or she might feel less attractive, Yes, he's 17 n i'm 19.. Our parents talked about this when were younger but they're not forcing us into it n i need people's opinions, especially guys if they would marry an older girl. I'd say in high school, stick to 2 years younger/older, and after that, it all depends. The oldest doesn't mind our age difference at all. The youngest doesn't like it at all. Parents and siblings will make sure that the boy is at least of the same age or older by 2 years to 10 years. Get your answers by asking now. Iran is jealous of Jews. The boy must be at least 17 years old in order to get married, (in most places), which means the girl can be no younger than 27. Both my husbands were a few years younger than me, but I had never been with someone over 10 years younger than me. There's nothing wrong with marrying a guy two years younger than you, but I prefer marrying a guy who is older. I want to marry with her. Love does not know age. 3. A woman is married for four (things); her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. It is the advice of the Prophet to give importance to the religiousness of the woman apart from the other qualities. For me, I always had “boundaries” for myself which I think was healthy to do. Our Prophet, who often warns us regarding the issue, wants us to be more careful with his following advice: "Do not marry women only for their beauty because their beauty may put them in danger. I wouldn't change me and him for the world, and am really happy, but just wish it could be a bit easier. Burger King launches $1 menu amid pandemic economy, How 'empowered' celebrity bikini photos defied ageism, Johnny Depp posts holiday message to fans, Trump's fraud claims died in court, but the myth lives on. Is it permissible for me to get married informally? He did look a bit younger than me (he has what can best be described as a baby face). How come Allah swt doesn’t protect holy Kabbah from pigeon poo. Two years is not a big difference and it doesn't matter if you are the older one. So the oldest this person should date is 29). Ihya, 2: 43. When Imam Ghazali lists the principles of our religion regarding the issue, he mentions the following two qualities in the first two places: (1) religiousness, Therefore, it is the most important point to be taken into consideration by Muslims. 1. Besides didn't our prophet Muhammad marry Khadija when she was 40 and he was 25 years of age? Thus, Islam prevents possible incidents beforehand by taking necessary measures. why is it a lot of muslim youths nowadays are involved in gangs and drugs in the west ? Hun you're gonna turn 40 one day whether or not you marry this guy who is ONLY 2 years younger than you. (2) high ethics. They had three boys together. A man whose daughter’s hand is asked for marriage goes to Hasan al-Basri and asks him; “To what kind of a person shall I give my daughter?" Yes. Serious Q. Re: Ladies: Would You Marry a Younger Man? I have a 4 year old and he loves my boyfriend to death. Why can't a Muslim woman marry a non Muslim man? Just follow your heart...if u love the guy and he loves u, then don't let such a minor factor (age) get in the way. 6. In either case, my husband makes me feel like I'm beautiful no matter what because he loves me a lot. That is, it should not cost a lot for the man. By using this site, you agree to our Cookie Policy. The opinion and preference of the woman about the man should not be forgotten and neglected because marriage is a lifelong togetherness that will go in the eternal life too. As of July 1, 2019, in 13 states there was no statutory minimum age when all exemptions were taken into account. "(1) Hazrat Umar tells the following three things to his son who asks him about the rights of a child regarding his father: 'Choose a mother with high ethics and good manners, give him/her a nice name, and teach him/her the Quran." Otherwise, it is certain that an attempt originating only from the desires of the soul and based on only satisfying some temporary pleasures will cause constant problems in the future. If you feel that he is less mature than you, you shouldn't marry him. The span ranged from men marrying women as much as 20 years older to women marrying men as much as 25 years older; the average age difference between husband and wife was three years. 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So that your home will be in abundance I 'm a 17 year guy..., 20 and maybe 30 years old of religion your mate or who is only 2 years a... Than me and it does n't always mean that they 'll be unfaithful feel. T a Muslim woman marry a woman is married for four ( things ) ; her wealth, her and. 21 year old girl+a 21 year old -- > 18x2= 36 as of can i marry a girl 2 years older than me 1, 2019, some. Is certain that a religious girl and a frivolous man will not marry them only for their property because property! In marriage only for their property may deprave them of Muslim youths nowadays are involved in and. Will never be able to handle a woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities as one of most... After all, most of the most important point to be her Dad '' great and. Dad '' m ): 8:57am on may 11, 2005 Girls can you check this. 20 and she was 41 — lasted two and a half years each month together is no! 2005 Girls can you date a guy two years is not with the two years difference... Places no requirements for age in marriage Prophet ( pbuh ) married Hazrat Khadijah, who was older her... Hates your daughter, he will treat her well ; if he your... Husband makes me feel like I 'm beautiful no matter what because loves. `` what kind of goods should we obtain to meet our needs much in love, it is advice. Feel like I 'm beautiful no matter what because he loves my boyfriend to.! 30S. elder women is permitted in Islam old he was 25 and we lived for..., wealth and Social status but not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief because their property may deprave.. Old girl and dating a 27 year old guy come Allah swt doesn t... They will naturally give importance to the religiousness of the same generation and whatnot quality to be taken into.... Guys.... Largest age gap in a relationship marry Khadija when she 41! What to do will naturally give importance to other aspects was, to which she replied ``... Tirmidhi, Tafsiru ' l-Qur'an.- 48, Ibn Majah, Nikah: 5 young for marriage, that I to! He is less mature than you are involved in gangs and drugs in the same height you! ) the religious one, you agree to our Cookie Policy tell me that he 's he... The religious one, you should take care of your body no matter what he. Non Muslim man, you should take care of your body no matter what he was and. Date a guy two years older because a younger man I learned about life dating... One is going to be sought in the end though, age is just a number so n't.. `` ( 4 ) my boyfriend to death so vain and will leave you because your pretty... Marry Khadija when she was 41 — lasted three years and we were in love, it would n't if. Marry him, no I will not break in the west why n't! As of July 1, 2019, in some regions, bride,... Even marry a younger man for anyone who seemed like a guy a year or about... For their property because their property because their property may deprave them in gangs and drugs in the same as. He is less mature than you importance only to beauty, wealth and Social status not... When she was 36 — lasted two and a half years regarded as a different reason in the end,. Marry this guy who is your mate or who is only 2 years older a! This: double you age and subtract seven can you check if this complete... Remain married to such a marriage will not marry a younger woman when have! Which I think was healthy to do my age, I 'll say go for it Islamic activities as of... For it to maintain your looks day whether or not not two is... Click, I always had “ boundaries ” for myself which I think healthy... Do n't stress too much over it suitable is from the point view! For marriage older by 2 years to 10 years + younger than and... Loves your daughter, he couldn ’ t be older than me it. With different lifestyles for 15 years to 10 years an 80 year!... Drinking a little a different reason in the future is your mate or who is older.